Discussion Skills in Groups

Discussion skills in conclaves To be human is to move with other tribe, to consociate to others, often in groups. In groups a wholly series of projectiles move on. People allow perplex different reasons for cosmos in a group, will want differing affaires come on of it, may not get on equally well with everyone in that group. Many of the groups we be in become a social purpose, meeting friends, sacking on holiday, work on a line of work. Whilst we may not think more than or slight(prenominal) it consciously we need a range of personal/social skills to relate well with others, to come to nubble upments, to contact group ends.This is particularly the slip-up when we come to co-operate with others in redact to achieve a specific work goal. In particular this occurs when working in small discussion groups, when having to make a familiarizeation or when involved in social, political or environmental action. This document is active what you need to know and th e skills that you need to develop in order to do that well. 1. FEELING SAFE What comes up I curio what comes up for you when you chance yourself in a group? Some of the fingerings will probably be Who atomic number 18 these people? Will I want them? Will they like me?What if person criticises me? Or it could be This should be fun. Im looking forward to this. I might learn something new-fangled here. I might make new friends. Probably it will be a mix of the two. But notice that in each case what comes up ar quite strong feelings. This is normal for everyone. The important thing is to pay attention to them, to listen to them, to see what they tell you more or less yourself. The emotive (feeling) force field is equally as important as the cognitive ( sentiment) domain in social experience. Some of the feelings you will have when first in a group will be to do with safety.Does it feel OK to be here? Are these people I want to be with? If you have chosen who you be with this may partly be on the basis of how safe you feel with them, supported and respected by them. recollect other people will be having similar feelings to your own. 1 fundament rules It is trying to work well with others in a group if you are feeling insecure, setting up a framework which helps give a sense of security to the group is thus essential. This involves agreement on what are called ground rules. Ground rules should be agreed by the group members themselves.Here are five essential ones. Speaking only one person speaks at a time, this could be as a result of putting a hand up or agreeing to return turns to speak. Listening it is important to in truth listen to what the other person is saying without interrupting them. Not judging it is rightfully important to listen without making judgements near the other person, this is where they are glide slope from, respect that. Sharing no one person should dominate the discussion, no person should be left out, everyone shoul d be encouraged to contri savee.Voice its not about saying the right thing or having an answer, its about finding your voice, which may be just to say what youre feeling. The group task The most important thing in a task orientated group is to reach agreement on the goal and how best to achieve it. There is always a tension amidst individual/group needs that has to be resolved. You may thus have to put some of your own needs aside in order to achieve the set task. This does not mean ignoring them. You might want to accede it in turns at the beginning just to say how you feel about being in the group before getting beat to the task.Q Is in that location anything you need to do before you can be truly present to what weve got to do? 2. DISCUSSION SKILLS Sharing feelings It often really helps the group dynamic to periodically check-in with how you are feeling about the task. You might accordingly make observations such as I feel really brainsick about working together on this I feel really daunted about the task we have to do I feel nervous about having anything valuable to contribute. Such statements applyt necessarily require an answer but they do reveal what is going on for you.Others know where youre at and can then bugger off this into account. Feelings are kept out in the open which, if not 2 expressed, might hinder transaction of the task. They may also often thrash a chord of sympathy with others. Sharing opinions For a group to achieve its task everyone needs to contribute, this means everybody needs to share their thoughts and opinions in the group. twain things may happen at first i) you may feel you dont have anything to say ii) you may be nervous about sharing your ideas with others.Firstly, whatever the topic you will have some responses to it, so spend a moment or two jotting down any questions, ideas, experiences which you feel may be relevant. Secondly, it is quite alright to be tentative about what you first say. It is often only in the help of discussion that your ideas will begin to become clear. Remember to hold your certainties lightly, i. e. whilst stating your opinion about a particular issue you may still find you want to re handsome or alter it later. Similarly other peoples starting points may not be where they finish up. expeditious listeningDont be afraid to remind the group of the ground rules for by remembering these the group will feel a safer place in which to experiment and try out ideas. Everyone has a shared responsibility here. vigorous listening means really listening to what someone is saying whether you agree with them or not. It means not interrupting or spending the time thinking about your answer. It is also really helpful to check out with the speaker unit that you have beneathstood correctly what they are saying. This can best be done by paraphrasing what you feel they have said and rebounding that gumption to them. What I heard you say was The speaker then knows she has rea lly been heard or can clarify any points if she needs to. When everyone feels really listened to and respected achievement of the groups task will be much easier and more fun. 3. REACHING AGREEMENT Working co-operatively If your group is following all of these strategies and it does keep back practice you are well on the way to good co-operative working. Co-operative working involves considering different ways to set about the task and 3 agreeing on the best one. If you feel safe in the group you are less likely to mind about making compromises sometimes.Working co-operatively does not mean that everyone has to agree. You may work co-operatively and supportively to identify the main differences of opinion on an issue and to really clarify the arguments for and against different opinions. Co-operative working also means working to playact out the best in others. Difficulties and disagreements However well a group gets on there will still be difficulties and disagreements. If some ones behaviour upsets you what should you do? First, remember the ground rules Second, you need to share how you are feeling.There is a crucial difference between saying You really bedevil me when you play around in the group (blaming) and I find it difficult to focus on the task when you play around (ownership of your own feelings). On some issues discussion may get heated and someone may need to use the ground rules to cool things down. You might say allows take a few minutes out to reflect on whats happening here. Is there a more inferential way in which we could move this forward, I wonder? It is also fine to disagree No one is suggesting that everyone in the group must have the same opinion on how best to do something.However, if it is a embodied task, e. g. a seminar presentation, everyone will need to agree on how to share this out and work effectively together. Staying on task It always helps to stand back occasionally and watch what is going on in a group. Is someone do minating conversation, is someone staying quiet, is the group getting off task? It is always important and helpful to feed your observations back to the group. Keeping on task can have both a narrow and a giving interpretation. You may feel that conversation is straying from the task and topic under discussion and decide to draw attention to this.You might be right, but what appears to be straying off course can sometimes maneuver to fruitful insights and a sharpened perception of the issue. Developing these skills will take time, you will make mistakes that you can learn from, and you will try again. in stages you will find that working in a group is less daunting than you may have thought, that you do have something to contribute, and that synergy begins to occur this is when 4 the insight and output of the group begins to feel more than the sum of its individual parts. David Hicks T4BW 5